Will You Be The Windshield Wiper

Oh my goodness, the human perspective on events that actually happen astounds me.  As fifty different people witness one drop of water hitting the ground, 50 very different impressions/ideas/memories are formed. And I am clearly right and you are not so right, so I am going to help you to have my experience of the drop of water and ALL will be well. Mua ha ha ha!!!

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Hello Spring! No Cleaning this Year.

Showing inside of a white paned window open to see spring blooms
“Just a few days, and they are in full bloom” by storebukkebruse (CC BY 2.0). See it at https://flic.kr/p/9yQj9o

Again I’ve had quite an interlude from writing as I’ve been in the middle of starting a rather enterprising business. I’ll do a quick blog about it in the future, but it is past time that I get to the purpose of this blog: Meditating our way to perfection and bliss… Or at least some peace and calm amidst your day.

This month in meditation class we are looking at moving toward solution.  It seems in the area of people moving toward growth and improvement, there is constant clamoring for purging out old issues.  We are ever vigilant of our faults and being rid of them.  Well in the interest of spring growth, I say forget it all.

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Good Luck Getting an A+ Buddy

… Because they don’t exist. You cannot achieve your way through meditation. There is no diploma. Realistically, there really even isn’t a goal. Whether that last statement is really true or not, what if you looked at meditation as if it were true? As if every time you sat (or stood, or walked, or layed down) there was no goal?

Maybe an intention of following a specific focus like the breath or a sound or mantra,but no actual goal or expectation for how the meditation will BE or how “good” you will do.

Too many people that I talk to put an immense amount of strain on themselves to “relax dammit!” It’s really not effective on any planet.

So who cares. Just sit. When you notice you mind has drifted, cool, just bring it back gently & lovingly. If you stay with the focus an absurdly long time compared to usual, no big deal, if you don’t, whatever. Take the Key West view to meditation. Relax and enjoy. Its all just perfect in this moment.

Love and Light,
Val

To learn more about what I do or to book a session, visit meditationcounselingbrevard.com for local classes, individual sessions in person or via phone/skype.

This work is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 4.0 International License. To view a copy of this license, visit The Creative Commons Site.

This blog is not meant to diagnose or treat any medical or mental condition. Please seek the help of a licensed mental health professional or a doctor for any medical or mental health symptoms. This blog assumes no liability for how content is used.

Virtual Meditation Class

For our friends not in Cocoa Beach,  you can join our Saturday Morning Meditation class from your own home.

Do not say…. Oh i will bookmark and do it later. (You will? Really?) If you have even thirty minutes now, just do it. No time like the present.

Morning Chakra Clearing Meditation with Doreen Virtue: http://youtu.be/GtCWyX9RC1U

This month we are talking about love.  Since I’m dealing with a residual cough and a very not soothing voice from a nasty cold and I didn’t want to cancel class, I dug into my cds.  I found an amazing guided meditation to use that is the perfect morning meditation.

So love yourself enough this morning to give yourself one hour to align your self for the week.  We will start with a thirty minute Doreen Virtue chakra opening meditation. My favorite part of this meditation is the heart opening affirmations. “I am love.” It gets no simpler nor more powerful than that. This meditation is designed to ready you for the day by opening and clearning each chakra. Listen to this meditation then have another youtube or cd of gentle meditation music ready for twenty or thirty minutes of silent meditation.

Like any meditations we do, when listening to the CD or breathing in silent meditation, be gentle with yourself. As soon as you notice that your focus has drifted, let any thoughts, ideas, judgements, opinions go into the thought stream. Return back to your focus point, be it guided voice, music, breath or whatever other focus point you are using.  Do this as many times as necessary. The key to mindfulness is not in perfect staying woth the focus point, but in exercising the awareness that the mind had gone elsewhere.

I found the same meditation on YouTube actually that is on the CD I own. This youtube is not the certified version but i wanted to share it. I dont ever use guided cds in class but today was a special case because my voice had been shot. If you get the chance though, check out Doreen Virtues actual YouTube channel.  Also i have some of her books and cards at home.  Her daily Angel cards are my favorite cards.

Try this out and be ready for an item hearted weekend.

Love and Light,

Val

To learn more about what I do or to book a session, visit meditationcounselingbrevard.com for local classes, individual sessions in person or via phone/skype.

The writing in this post by Valerie is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 4.0 International License. To view a copy of this license, visit The Creative Commons Site.

This blog is not meant to diagnose or treat any medical or mental condition. Please seek the help of a licensed mental health professional or a doctor for any medical or mental health symptoms. This blog assumes no liability for how content is used.

A Valentines Meditation

This makes a great 30 minute meditation or even longer. Try the whole thing or just parts of it. Take some time tonight to love yourself with this meditation. We put much thought into how we treat others, but sometimes forget about ourselves. This is great way to start at the source.

Do you have a hot date tonight? Do this with your partner. Or google “eye-gazing” and do that for ten or fifteen minutes.

Bring your love for yourself and others to the next level.

(Do not do this while driving please!) .

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Meditation
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Take a few minutes just to follow the sensations of your breathing.

Focus on your heart chakra area.

See bright light coming in each breath and filling and expanding in your heart. Continue to do this letting warmth fill your chest.

Then do a body scan, very slowly, from the top of your head all the way down sending love to each area of your body. Let any thoughts, ideas, opinions go into a the thought stream. To each part, let love say “I see you as you are created perfectly for this moment” . Keep your focus there in your heart chakra as you do the scan sending love each part of your body. Try to notice as many small parts of parts as you can appreciating each part of your body. 

After you’re done if there are any parts that were hard to send love to or where there were sticky spots, return to them letting any shoulds go into the thought stream and sending extra love to those spots. Say to each part: “I see you as you are created perfectly for this moment.”

Do the same thing now with all the amazing systems of your body, thanking each amazing part for all that it does.: Circulatory, Skeletal, Muscular, Nervous, Respiratory, Digestive, Reproductive. (What am I missing? Anatomy wasn’t my strongest, but you get my point.)

Then look at your personality, behaviors, mannerisms, and beliefs. Keep your focus point in the warmth of your heart chakra. Send love to each part, letting judgements go into the thought stream. Again, “I see you perfectly created for this moment.” Sending love to each part of you that comes to mind.

Finally, (You could just do this one the whole time if you want.. It would make a great prolonged meditation.) keeping your focus in your heart chakra area, send waves of love out to your body, mind, spirit, energy body and feel them echoing back. Just sit in the waves of love letting thoughts, ideas, judgments go in the thought stream. Just experience.

Happy Valentine’s Day. Enjoy.

To learn more about what I do or to book a session, visit meditationcounselingbrevard.com for local classes, individual sessions in person or via phone/skype.

All rights reserved. Valerie P. 2015.

This blog is not meant to diagnose or treat any medical or mental condition. Please seek the help of a licensed mental health professional or a doctor for any medical or mental health symptoms. This blog assumes no liability for how content is used.

Preparing For Valentine’s Day With Mindfulness

Godzilla action figure pointing with a planning stick to a map of Japan
“Planning session” by worldislandinfo.com (CC BY 2.0) See it at https://flic.kr/p/u6A8E
What comes with planning the future. Godzilla contemplates Japan. I wonder how that will go for him?

My oh-so-clever theme for February, “Open Hearted”, boils down to a possibly cliche, but still powerful topic for the month.  With Valentines only 4 days away, many people may be thinking of all of the things that will be happening on that day.

I could give two licks what will be happening.  I have a twin flame who I am blessed to journey with (in the same household) and we are deciding what we will be doing.  However, the real key that I am addressing with myself and putting out there for all of you is:

How are you being?

Are you being stressed out and preoccupied with plans?

Are you battling self-pity?

Are you focused on love and the present moment?

Are you open to the beauty of the possibilities the day may bring?

The best way to find out how you are being is to look at the thoughts associated with the topic.  Take some time each day before Valentines to DO NOTHING. Get quiet and allow the ideas/concepts/notions of the meanings associated in your mind with Valentines.  If journaling is part of your process, jot some stuff down, or better yet blog about it.

As you watch your meanings/shoulds/associations with the holiday, do not allow the mind to judge.  No matter how silly your expectations are, lets get them into the light so that you can see if they are valid and useful.  (Yes, some expectations are useful.)  Get real about how you feel about the day, what you want, and what you think others expect.

Here’s a bit of mine:

“I have mixed feelings about Valentines Day because of the pressure of the day.  I already love my husband but I attribute a lot of unspoken responsibility on him to pull a magical prince charming (my husband is amazing, but when i do this, it sets an impossible standard). I don’t want to deal with crowds. I want to feel pretty. I desperately hope the sitter comes through so that we can have at least a bit of a date.   No matter what, we will enjoy each other immensely and stare deeply into each others eyes and kiss. Hopefully we can consecrate the evening! There is so much money stuff attributed to Valentines day.  I have to make sure that I get our kid to make valentines.Remember when I was a kid and made Valentines and lots of people didn’t like me.  I wonder if I will be able to fit into the dress I want to wear.”

WHEW! That is a whole lot running through my head about one little day.  I’m sure I could come up with more if I wanted.   My point is, I got these out in the light so I can see the forces that will be acting on me subconsciously and affecting my emotional state that day.

Try this yourself. Even if something seems silly, write it down.  Mindfully watch your thoughts without judgement. Continue to meditate on it. What beliefs no longer serve you?  What are new ways of thinking about the holidays?

Then to end each meditation, visualize how you would like to feel on Valentines… Serene? Loved? Loving? Joyful? Grateful?  See yourself in the day, without including specific plans and practice feeling what you see yourself feeling. You are training your subconscious mind in this way and redirecting old thought patterns.

I would love to hear from all of you that take a few minutes to try this.

Enjoy your week!

Love and Light,

Val

To learn more about what I do or to book a session, visit meditationcounselingbrevard.com for local classes, individual sessions in person or via phone/skype.

This work is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 4.0 International License. To view a copy of this license, visit The Creative Commons Site.

This blog is not meant to diagnose or treat any medical or mental condition. Please seek the help of a licensed mental health professional or a doctor for any medical or mental health symptoms. This blog assumes no liability for how content is used.

3 Minute Meditation Challenge: Serious Silliness

THE SCATMAN – Scatman John HD1080p: http://youtu.be/y6oXW_YiV6g

You are most welcome for getting that song stuck in your head for the rest of the day. Bwa haha. My evil plan has suceeded.

Onto the meditation: For three minutes mentally chant a super silly mantra. For me, I would also probably pick one from Monty Python’s Holy Grail. A tongue twister or just a silly phrase. Or a silly tune. With your breath, repeat this “mantra.” As soon as you notice that your mind has gone elsewhere just return it to your focus mantra. Repeating it again with each breath.

Why? Because mindfulness isn’t just paying attention to serene things or watching issues within one’s self. Mindfulness is examining it all. Watch your body’s energy, see how silliness changes it. Watch to see if changes your attitude. Enjoy.

Anyone can find 3 minutes to do anything.  Post a comment here to let us all know about your experience.

Love and Light,

Val

To learn more about what I do or to book a session, visit meditationcounselingbrevard.com for local classes, individual sessions in person or via phone/skype.

The writing in this post by Valerie is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 4.0 International License. To view a copy of this license, visit The Creative Commons Site.

This blog is not meant to diagnose or treat any medical or mental condition. Please seek the help of a licensed mental health professional or a doctor for any medical or mental health symptoms. This blog assumes no liability for how content is used.

Overcoming Addiction

I dont regularly watch videos people have posted but i was so caught by the blog that I watched it all the way through. Great read and great video (insight packed 3 minutes).

TotalVictory

Listening to the very wise and brilliant Gabor Maté has gotten me thinking a lot lately about addiction and mental illness.  As he states in one of his videos that was so insightful it almost caused me to fall off my chair:

At the root of addiction is pain.

When we try to escape pain we just create more of it.

We need to learn to sit with our pain.  Then we can figure out what it’s all about.

As Maté wisely points out we live in a society that wants instant relief and isn’t comfortable facing itself.  He defines addiction quite broadly, as being anything with negative consequences that we keep on doing despite those negative consequences.  This could include compulsive exercise, becoming a workaholic, food, sex, along with the more commonly considered addictions such as alcohol and drugs.

To me the pain that’s at the root of addiction…

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Remove the Bit and Ride Life Bareback

Upon asking a really neat reader what shoulds she could live without, I got this gem of a response.

I could certainly live without thinking I ‘should’ leave my current job. It’s draining and it leaves you beginning your week days negatively.

I love the insight and awareness just in this statement.  She can see clearly that the “should” of wanting to leave is poisoning the current experience.

I believe this is a fairly common occurance in our day to day thinking. First, we have to look at the difference from desiring to change a situation and thinking that IT SHOULD NOT BE what it is. Or that we should be elsewhere.

I’m not an avid equestrian, but in my younger years I cared for some horses and attended some horse camps.  I tried different horses and terrains, styles of riding, and equipment.  My favorite way to ride was bareback, without saddle, bridle, harness or bit. It required a bit of recklessness, but also a truer connection with the horse.  It wasn’t so much as commanding a horse to do my bidding but to have a mutual experience with the horse. To take a journey together.

When we look at life as if things “ought” to be different, we look at this moment and say, “This moment, this Now is not as it should be.” Which is silly because this Now is this Now.  It is also, as my reader pointed out, it wastes an incredible amount of energy to fight the reality of now. We pull the reins and fight the horse and attempt to use it as a mount to go where we insist.  “We are not where we should be, we must go over there… *yank, struggle, pull, expletive*

Riding life bareback does not mean we have no “control” of our lives or that we simply roll over and stay in situations which do not feel beneficial.  It means being in the moment, connected to the moment, and looking forward.  Listening to the horse(life), noticing sings of paths around you, and responding to cues within yourself and all around you.  It is a symbiotic relationship. There is no coercion.  Simply connection.

This makes us more open to resources around us that we may not have been aware of before when we were stuck in shoulds. We have more energy, we are more helpful to people, we enjoy our time, and when the time arrives to move on from a situation, you will know it and be ready.

This kind of awareness of life and connection to everything around us can be achieved many ways; one of those paths is through meditation.  If it feels like a good fit for you, mindfulness meditation can  connect you to yourself, others, your innermost being, and the world around you.

Notice your shoulds. DO NOT TRY TO “SHOULD” YOUR “SHOULDS” AWAY!!!! (I shouldn’t have this should) Do you know what I mean? Be loving and accepting of your shoulds. When you notice throughout your day that you have stumbled upon a persepective or belief within yourself that is a “should”, laugh at it.  Acknowledge it.  Thank it.  Then send it along on its way and turn your focus what needs to be done next in that moment.  Gently and lovingly you are acknowledging these parts of yourself, but not giving them the fuel to grow.

Try it out for the week and let me know what you think. As always,

Love and Light,

Val

To learn more about what I do or to book a session, visit meditationcounselingbrevard.com for local classes, individual sessions in person or via phone/skype.

This work is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 4.0 International License. To view a copy of this license, visit The Creative Commons Site.

This blog is not meant to diagnose or treat any medical or mental condition. Please seek the help of a licensed mental health professional or a doctor for any medical or mental health symptoms. This blog assumes no liability for how content is used.

How Perfect Posture Can Make Perfect Meditation

Pose of woman laying on her belly  grabbing her feet in the air in a very difficult yoga posture
“Rocking Bow Pose by Sarah Siblik (CC BY-ND 2.0). See it at https://flic.kr/p/9FPMWR

Screw posture.

I tell my students to stand on their head if they feel the desire to. (no, it is not a yoga class.)

Yes, there are many physical/spiritual benefits to posture and there is also specific breathing and finger posturing.  This stuff is great.  It isn’t my focus at all.  I’m all about helping the subconscious mind to get a person to place where they are connected, open, and aware.

Years back, I read”The Art of Happiness” by the current Dalai Lama and what stuck out to me is that he really encourages people to find what works for them.

I heard another teacher with many talks and meditations on You Tube, Ajahn Brahm, that takes the time in the beginning of meditations to have students listen to what their bodies are telling them about what posture would be the most comfortable.

MEDITATION IS MEANT TO BE RELAXING. (it isn’t a job. no work required.)

 I tell my students to shift or change postures if they need to. Take a look at your “musts” and “shoulds” for meditation. Get rid of one.. Take it easy. Guess what, you still meditated.

However, I do use certain postures myself that I have found work for me but I’m sure they are not textbook perfect.  Somehow I still seem to meditate regularly and have amazing and calming experiences.

So research stuff, study with people, and try different things, but above all else, listen to your body and intuition. It will guide you always.

Love and Light,

Val

To learn more about what I do or to book a session, visit meditationcounselingbrevard.com for local classes, individual sessions in person or via phone/skype.

This work is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 4.0 International License. To view a copy of this license, visit The Creative Commons Site.

This blog is not meant to diagnose or treat any medical or mental condition. Please seek the help of a licensed mental health professional or a doctor for any medical or mental health symptoms. This blog assumes no liability for how content is used.